St. John Paul II calls out, "Dear young people, let yourselves be taken over by the light of Christ, and spread that light wherever you are."
the Call to Serve
At a random afternoon in the midst of gazing upon the crucifix in the main chapel, I whispered "where do you want me to go?"
Almost immediately, my parish's Catechetical coordinator personally came up to invite me for the umpteenth time to serve the L9 Confirmation batch again after serving the same batch for the past 2 years. My reflex said 'no', until I caught a glimpse of the Man on the cross. Resigned, I gave him my very tired 'Yes' to serve in the same ministry again.
At first it was confusion, then anger, then resignation to His will in my life. In the early stages of my discernment, I was certain that I was called to serve wholeheartedly to pioneer another ministry with my dream team.
Yet His plans for me are much greater than I can ever imagine.
the Hustle in Service
"Know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope." - Jeremiah 29:11
He continued to remain faithful in my hesitation, allowing me to work in a team with familiar brothers and sisters in Christ - some my very own facilitators, the others - the very youths I facilitated. We were provided a strong team who were ready to push and stand up for the young people of the Church. We were met with so many obstacles in light of the change in restrictions, so many lines of communication to pass through in order to get the green light to go as planned. So many wet blankets thrown on us in the days leading up to the retreat. The many uncertainties and anxieties crept in and the lies started to grow on me, that perhaps this was all a bad idea. I started to doubt my convictions and was on the verge of aborting mission in all that we have planned.
"Why are there sooo much resistance in letting the youths encounter your love? Is this not Your plan??" I spitefully asked Jesus.
Through His gentleness, He sent his people to pull through with me & run straight into the storm to go as planned, making do with the little that we had. Holding 67 youths, 23 service team members with 10 external helpers for worship team and 20 intercessory prayer warriors in a humble abode was not the easiest. Looking back, I am affirmed that it was only through Him that the program went through successfully. After all, these young people were His to begin with. It was never about the plan, the venue, the service teams - it was only about God and His love for his beloved children.
the Affirmation of the Mission
"You of little faith, why did you doubt?" - Matthew 14:31
Indeed, Lord, why did I ever doubt in your faithfulness in my life and in the lives of the young people whom you've entrusted to our care? I want to shout on the mountain tops that Christ is the same yesterday, today and forevermore. His love and mercy will never run out. Inasmuch as He has revealed His love for me he too has revealed the same, if not more, of His love to these young people.
From shy, quiet strangers who have been acquainted with one another for the past 2 years in online Catechism, to a beautiful vibrant community of youths who desire to want more of Jesus in their lives, thank YOU for showing me God's love. I want to affirm you for first and foremost allowing yourselves to be loved by Him, subsequently allowing His light to shine through you.
Dear L9s of 2022, I am so so grateful to have witnessed your desire to be part of his One body in the Church, to grow a vibrant community within the walls of SVDP. Thank you for rekindling my love for service - for inspiring me to want to lay down my life over and over again for the service of the Lord. As you received the Holy spirit, I too, received God's warm embrace. yet again. :)
"I will go wherever I'm needed" - Matu 2k22
Entering into this season was filled with hesitation, resistance and resignation. A part of me was questioning where I was called to go. I was certain of my Mission - to be the salt & light to those around me, but to what extent? I was feeling defeated from all the disruptions that kept on coming throughout the year. Despite all these, there was greater Hope.
As I learnt to die to myself, take up my Cross & follow him through the narrow gate, I was affirmed that I am right where I need to be. Adopting a humble disposition and surrendering wholeheartedly was very necessary to allow his Holy Spirit to move. “Lord, have your way in me,” was the cry of my heart amidst the frustrations. In the chaos of making sure we were on the right track, I was reminded by a fellow facilitator - in a discussion to where he should literally go to - that he will go to wherever he is needed. This simple phrase stuck to my heart & profoundly reminded me that I am a mere instrument of God, that He is in control. That I need only to be still & know that He is God.
In His Godship He has revealed Himself to the young people who cried out to him, moved through the service team who were full of anxieties, and especially had his way in me…
